Your Name

When I hear the sound of sadness. 

And the light is broken
by the silence of the trees.
I know all the birds have flown Away.
Their wings like words whispering
Your name

30 Days of Truth

Day 04 - Something I have to forgive someone for.

Bae for cheating on me. I don't have a grudge against her, just disappointed I guess. 

30 Days of Truth

Day 03 - Something I have to forgive myself for

Whoa, this is difficult. It's not everyday you dig up things you have buried very deep. This is hard. When I was younger my young brother was my only friend. We played together, got in trouble together, my partner in crime. Anyways, one day we were running around the yard and I guess I wasn't paying much attention to him and a grill door fell on his thumb splitting it right in the middle. Maybe it wasn't my fault, maybe it was. That is one. An old flame got pregnant (no it isn't mine). My indecision and unwillingness to let her in probably let to her getting pregnant. A friend told me that if it wasn't with the other dude, then it was going to be me. We just do not realise how much our decisions or lack of them affects other people.

One thing I know for sure is that I have beat myself up for a very long time about the choice that I have made and the opportunities I let slip. I know I need not do that but I don't know what causes me to place so much blame on myself. Sometimes I think to myslef, "It could have been worse, cheer up," but that doesn't ease me or put me at peace with what has happened. Self, you are forgiven. Self doesn't buy that. While I am trying to make peace with myself, as slow as that maybe, let's go to day 4

Regrets?

Would it have beenbetter left unsaid.

Would it have beenbetter left unseen.
To have never
heard your voice.
To have never
felt your touch.

Regrets?...never.

In honour of Friday

grateful not to be
en route to unemployment
eager for Monday

Why so serious?

give seriousness
the break it truly deserves
dare to be silly

The Last Time

The first time
you took him inside you
was the last time
I could ever desire you.

Strangers I Know

These strangers I feel I know 
These people I overhear 
With whom I exchange a few words 
A smile 
A glance 
Share moments 
These people next to me 
Something about this place rings us here as we are 
Different as we are 
Tied 
Human kind 
Zambian 
Linked by One 
We are all here 
Different kinds 
Searching for our own happiness 
Separate lives 
Chance encounters 
Moments of togetherness 
At the place we all love 
Young and old 
Women and men 
Differences cast away 
We are connected 
By this place 
By Zambia

30 Days of Truth

Day 02: Something I love about myself

There are loads of things I love and like about myself. I'll try and keep it short. I will push until I cannot push anymore. I am determined and love proving people wrong. I don't take being told that me accomplishing something is impossible. I have done before and I will do it again! I tend to overwork myself and feel the need to constantly keep busy. Don't get me wrong I have and love my lazy days (Sundays) but the need to be doing something leaves piles of things I must do constantly. Oh well, you know what they about an idle mind being the devils workshop

30 Days of Truth

Day 01: Something I hate about myself.

Well it used to be my skin colour, but I love that now. I am seriously finding it hard to find something that I hate about myself, dislike yes, hate no, which I suppose would lead me to the one thing that bugs me the most about myself which is indecision. Not to say that i don’t make decisions, but it takes me an innordinate amount of time to come to one. I tend to belabor my choices for way too long. Especially with projects, and I will do this with the smallest things. I end up forcing myself to make choices. this becomes much harder as things become more important. I suppose I could look at it as a good thing, but it really does wear on me over time. just make a choice and stick with it…. do it, do it now, and move on to the next thing…. how boring am I? I thought about this and then was like well maybe that’s not the thing, then again…. see? lol…. on to day 2, i’m leaving this one in the past now…

Slipping

I know she is slipping away.
The pauses are longer, 

the messages shorter.
I can feel the cooling of her heart in the May breeze that brushes my face. 

I can see the waning of her desire in the shrinking moon. 

I can sense the lack of her attention in my empty dreams.
I will never be a victim.
Undercover of darkness I build a boat from my words.
At dawn launches it upon the still and waiting, inky waters.
I do not look back.

Pictures and Sounds

The sun has set hours ago. I am falling asleep.
This reminds me of the colors of the sun.
A beautiful sunset.
I seem to remember the blaze of the waning sun.
As you left that first day. I was dipped in love.
My mind was drenched with the sight and taste of you.
I doubt you knew how much you had affected me.
A charming and beautiful girl, way beyond my reach.
I could only dream I would see you again.~

~ Would you have come back again, if you knew how much I already loved you?

One Day

One day, I'll dialogue with you face to face,
however, my cowardice exceeds my fortitude
one night you'll drive with me from place to place
but for now I am on an imagined longitude
one life we'll walk a love together, pace to pace
with a monogamous and purposeful attitude
yet somehow I have already loved you
I just need to prove it to you at some point, but not now.

Change

She watched him with curiosity,
wondering when he would muster the courage
to stand up and say hello.
Just one little word,
was all she needed;
five letters, a simple –
“Hello.”
Startled,
she took a step back and froze.
Was this really happening?
Was her waiting finally over?
Before she could think,
before she could speak,
he was saying his name
and asking for hers.
What should she say?
What could she say?
Her voice had already gone.
So all that escaped her dry parchéd mouth,
was a raspy and ugly old
“Hi.”
But of course that was not, her actually name,
and her face flushed furiously red.
She wanted no more
than to run out right then;
she wanted no more
than to die.
But die she did not,
and her voice did return,
and she managed to
tell him her name.
And from that moment on
they were never the same,
for everything had changed.

Only a sigh

It was just the scent of her.A faint memory of a moment. 

A whisper of her presence. 

The slightest movement as she passed.
It made me catch my breath. 

It sent a shiver dancing through me. 

It made me close my eyes 

and shake my head.She is achingly beautiful. 

A wild, untamed, exquisite beauty beyond words. 

Beyond compare.
Beyond me.
She vanished so quickly 

that I know I must have dreamed her.
I am left with only a sigh.